Sometimes it only takes one phone call….. Hearing that familiar voice after so long brings back so many memories of a time not so long ago when you were inseparable, when you would see each other every day and still talk on the phone for hours afterwards – you may think I’m talking about a boyfriend or girlfriend…. Nope, I value much more – A Best Friend!!
Definitions of a best friend vary but surprisingly 'Urban Dictionary' says it best; “Best Friends are the very special people in your life. They are the first people you think about when you make plans. They are the first people you go to when you need someone to talk to. You will phone them up just to talk about nothing, or the most important things in your life. When you’re sad they will try their hardest to cheer you up. They give the best hugs in the world (even if, like me you hate hugs:P)! They are the shoulder to cry on, because you know that they truly care about you. In most cases they would take a bullet for you, coz it would be too painful to watch you get hurt.”
Growing up a BFF (best friend forever) usually meant that one person in your class or in your home crowd that you did everything with, you would talk the same, walk the same, like the same things and sometimes even dress the same…. However, when you grow up things start to change; instead of having just one BFF, you might have a few extraordinary people in your life that really & truly understand you; people who you can completely be yourself around and not give a care in the world about your actions or feelings because they won't judge you for the stupid things you may do or say.
For me I think it’s the latter and it took a long time to get there. Growing up I believed in the concept of having that ONE BEST FRIEND for life, but circumstances led to me seeing them turn their backs on me. This made me lose faith in the entire concept and build walls around myself coz I didn’t want to get hurt again. I kept everyone at arm’s length – sure you’d be my friend but there would always be boundaries. It took a long time - and in my late teens a couple of friends (who would later go on to become some of my best friends to date) calling me out rather bluntly on not letting anyone in - to slowly start to rebuilding my belief in the latter concept. I still keep up the walls but if you can and do break through them then you would automatically reach the status of BFF; and frankly I think I’ve got some of the good ones.
Which brings me back to the phone call. Life being what it is we don’t always make the effort to keep in touch or meet up like we used to back in our school & uni days, but that doesn't mean we don’t think of them every day. So today I made the effort and called up one of mine in the land down under. And here’s the best part – even though we hadn’t spoken in more than 3 months it seemed like no time had passed – she was still the same person I saw way back in august, still the person I go to advise on things other people would think are trivial, still the person I could drool over hot guys with, still the same person I could laugh about the weirdest things with. Even when more than a thousand miles separated us, she still gets me. That's the beauty of a best friend and it makes me miss her even more.
The same can be said for most of the others too. 2011 has been one of the most trying years of my life and it hasn’t been any less trying when it came to friendships. I’ve had to deal with some of my bestest friends moving abroad, getting married and leaving to new lives, and even the ones left in colombo becoming increasingly busy so much so that we hardly ever meet…. Guess that’s all a part of growing up and I need to learn to deal with it no matter how much I miss them.
The worst is that sometimes this also leads you to growing apart.People change as you grow older and sometimes the person you thought you knew inside out does a dramatic 180° and virtually becomes a stranger, whether by choice or by circumstance – and it plain SUCKS!! when you can't seem to do anything to change it coz you know things will never be like they used to... It could also be that you changed as well, but it doesn’t make you miss them any less. I guess we can’t always be kids in our thinking that best friends need to see each other and talk to each other everyday, and always like the same things to maintain that bond.
I know that no matter how often or how little I see or speak to them the people that matter will always have that special place in my heart. So please know that even if I might not talk to you as much as I used to or hang out as much as we used to, doesn't mean I love you guys any less…. I would still take that bullet for you, come bail you out of jail if you need me to, try my best to give you advice if you need me to, go get buzzed with you if you had a bad day, or just be there to listen to you if you need to vent your frustration about anything no matter how stupid you think it might be!!!
In the words of Micheal Jackson “Just call my name & I’ll be there” – Miss you guys loads everyday!!! xoxo
