I'm sure that most of us feel like we are stuck in a prison cell when it comes to our offices, especially certain govt. offices and such that will remain unnamed...... One of my good friends sent me this list sometime ago which explains exactly how we feel and also gives us a few survival tips for surviving our metaphoric "Guantanamo Bay", which I felt was too good to remain unpublished.... All credit goes out to $ - Man with a lil bit of tweaking by yours truly....
1. It will always be boring – there is no survival tip for this, come loaded with quality reading material or load your phone up with a lots of games
2. You’re on your own - Do not even think of befriending the other inmates coz they will most likely be caught up in their own life sentences to care, so always look out for "Numero Uno"
3. Talking with a colleague is frowned upon by the wardens
4. Talking with a colleague from the opposite gender is definitely frowned upon and will be the topic of the week
5. You aren’t at any circumstance supposed to look happy – if you smile with some one, 90% of the time don’t expect one back
6. Even when you don’t have any work you are supposed to sit at your seat and stare at your computer from 8.30 – 5.30 (only if you are lucky - Otherwise this may even stretch out to 7.00 or even 8.00)
7. Always walk around with a book in your hand, because just idling around is another reason for frowns
8. Open minded – You won’t find it here
9. Additional benefits other than your salary – Don’t expect any ever, they may say health benefits – Kidding me right???
10. People on 'Death Row' under the sun roof get an additional benefit of getting baked in the sun from around August to January – Wow a Free Tan!! Bring on the Vitamin D!!!
11. If the AC and the lifts are switched off – its part and parcel of the daily goings on..... You can expect to start work in the sveltering heat and end it up just the same....
12. The tiled wall on the ground floor does make it look like a hospital – you’re supposed to look past it and appreciate the artistic beauty
13. There are two tea breaks one at 9.30AM and another at 3.30PM – Please be in your seat at these times if you want this privilege, as you will not be entitled to "sugar syrup" at any other time
14. No Canteen - bring your own rations or starve in the process, coz at Guantanamo Bay their ain't a decent eating place for miles around... and its not like you'll be let out just to eat!!!
15. The Chief Warden (who might at times be slightly delusional) will have you do random tasks that have no meaning within the shortest possible time span...and then when you have completed this task.... will make you redo the same thing 50 different ways in the same time span - Just because he feels like it and just because he can!!!
16. On occasion you will be let out for Good Behaviour, but this will involve a lot of hard manual labour and kow-towing to wardens from other branches of Guantanamo Bay.
17. Having an opinion is not encouraged, discussing your opinion with others is frowned upon. In fact it would be much appreciated if all inmates were brainless clones, whose minds can be moulded according to the wishes of the warden.
18. There is no escaping this place alive – The only ways out are to swim through the garbage river or run the 1 kilometer to the gate
Happy Musing Folks.... See you soon...xoxo
